Me vs A Duck update

This many years into the strange war that I started with my mother, that has now extended to include children, siblings, and spouses, it shouldn't surprise me at all when the ante keeps getting upped. 

My mom is still finding ducks (she's currently recovered 38), but it turns out that both her and my dad have been using more than a little free time formulating plans and flexing their arts and crafts muscles in the interest of warfare. And I have to admit they've outdone themselves. 

When they showed up this weekend for a visit they had "gifts" for us. May I present for your consideration, then next generation of the Duckening....

First, meet the Turducken. It's stuffed full of tiny ducks, and I wish it had stayed that way. When my youngest removed the tape gag and unstuffed this rubbery horror, he discovered that when squeezed it made a sound so uniquely awful, that a dream dies every time the noise reaches your ears.  What is especially amazing is that this is obviously a dog toy made by Satan, and my parents don't own a dog; they went out looking specifically for stuffable bird and bought it for this one special purpose. I can't even be mad. Well done. 

The next up was my gift. Cheese and Quackers. I can hear you all groan; I did the same thing. This is a terrible pun and deserves our displeasure. Fully and beautifully wrapped, I received cream cheese and a surprisingly well resealed package of "quackers". At least I got a block of cream cheese out of it. 

And finally, the piece de resistance, and possibly an homage to the Olympics being held in France, may I present to you Duck a l'Orange.  I mean, really, no notes. This is just brilliant. Although the mouth-feel does leave a bit to be desired, and it has more crunch than I would expect of a French delicacy. 10/10

Guess it's my turn next. I have some ideas...